There is so much I don’t understand about the Gods of Egypt trailer. First off who thought a movie about feuding Egyptian gods was a good idea, and then to have it star two very white dudes: Jamie Lannister (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) and King Leonidas (Gerard Butler). Three if you count Jamie Lannister’s plucky human sidekick (I am not going to bother looking it up).
I mean I kind of get it. People aren’t watching swords and sandals movies anymore, so let’s try and mix it up by having different people wear the sandals, but still, no. Not to mention different people aren’t wearing the sandals. They are the same people, but just representing a different people group, so they kind of messed up their own idea.
Even more confounding is that even though this is the first trailer, they have given away the entire movie. In order! The two gods fight and Jamie looses his eyes. Leonidas is a very bad god and subjugates Egypt, so the humans send some plucky kid to help Jamie. They struggle their way back to Egypt so Jamie and Leonidas can go at it again. The only thing they didn’t show was Jamie almost losing, but then the plucky human does something to save Jamie at the last minute. The trailer was one scene away from being the CliffsNotes to its own movie.
God of Egypt is shaping up to be 2016’s The Last Witch Hunter, but it may even look worse, and that is saying something.