Teen Titans Go Gave Us The Best Possible Version Of Fall Out Boy!

Teens Titans God made an 80’s throwback rock opera, and it was sooooo good!  Now they released a music video to top it all off!  Fall Out Boy has become the new They Might Be Giants in that if you need a theme or a song for your show or movie they got you covered.  That is not something I would have expected from them when they started out their career, but hey, we all got to make a living somehow.  For now just enjoy this lovely video!

The Kids Today Have The Best Cartoons!

When I was a kid I had to suffer through tons nonsensical dialog and plot devices to see cool interlocking cat robots fight crazy evil bad guys.  Not so with kids today.  They can turn on Voltron and see actual character development and long term plots that make sense.  Not to mention bad guys with actual plans, and it all gets even better in ‘season’ three.  Plus they still get cool interlocking cat robots!  How dare DreamWorks and Netflix create quality programming for kids!

The biggest flaw in season three is that it is only seven episodes long, so it is missing a third act.  It just kind of ends, and that is how the Voltron of old would have finished things.  Just leaving kids to wonder what happened and why they all become different space explorers in the next season, but no, today’s spoiled kids get the promise of more this October.  They will get to see what Prince Lotor is up to, and I am sure it will be awesome.  It just isn’t fair.

Stupid spoiled kids and their awesome TV.  They will never understand the terrible stuff we had to watch.  Heck their He-Man and Thundercats made sense.  Sure they get terrible Transformers movies, but that seems like a small price to pay for living through the golden age of television.  Oh, if you haven’t watched it yet, the third season of Voltron is pretty darn great.  (Shmee goes to the ocean and then shakes his fist at the tide!)

We Are Getting À La Carte TV. Proving You Should Be Careful What You Wish For…

Disney announced that after its two year deal with Netflix is done it will pull all of its movies and shows off of the popular streaming service.  This is so it can launch its own online streaming network.  There has been no word yet on how this will affect the current Marvel/Netflix co-produced TV shows.  Though I am guessing due to their success they will continue to stay on Netflix and continue to be made by the same team.

The real news is that there will soon be yet another streaming TV service.  It will be joining the likes of Netflix, Hulu, HBO Now, CBS All Access, CW Seed, and the soon to be launching yet to be titled DC/Warner Brothers online network.  Plus who knows how many others are in the works.  Netflix opened Pandora’s TV box, and now every TV Service provider who’s ratings have taken a hit due to streaming media want a piece of the action.  This would be fine if the channels were going to be cheap, but it looks like they will start around $5.99 a month a piece and then go up from there.  Heck HBO Now is $15 a month.  You thought à la carte programing was going to save you money.  Well guess what, it won’t.

People are going to have to think long and hard about what services they are going to watch and need, and if these services keep dividing up their content and charging a lot for it, it may force people back to cable to ‘save’ money.  For some reason when people said they wanted to be able to pick and choose their channels they assumed that they could still just pay the $1 to $2 a channel like they are now.  That of course is not the case.

The à la carte future everyone said they wanted is almost here, and it is going to cost us all a fortune.  Not to mention the services we using now are going to continue to have less content as shows and movies are added to their IP owners’ own services.  Somehow the future is always less cool than we hoped it would be.

There Is Nothing New To See At The Dark Tower!

I did my best to read all the books before watching The Dark Tower, and I am glad that I did, but the books didn’t help me gain any understanding with what was going on in the movie.  Not that the movie is confusing in any way, because it is constantly going out of its way to inform the audience with what is going on, but because it is a radical departure from the books.  That is not my main issue with The Dark Tower however, my issue is that they turned one of the craziest Sci-Fi/Fantasy/Western universes out there in to something generic.

The Dark Tower is about Jake Chambers (Tom Taylor), who see visions of a strange land and a Dark Tower, and an ongoing battle between a Man in Black (Matthew McConaughey) and The Gunslinger (Idris Elba).  Jake seems to think that the current series of world wide earthquakes are due to the Man in Black attacking The Dark Tower.  No one believes Jake of course, so he has to travel to Mid-World himself to find The Gunslinger and save The Dark Tower.

It probably made sense to the writers to make the movie about Jake instead of the Gunslinger because then Jake could be the avatar for the audience seeing all these strange things for the first time.  Of course if any of this was strange it probably would have been fine, but in all honestly had you told me that this was just the next Maze Runner movie and in this one they can hop dimensions, I would have believed you.  Mid-World is just a random place with a lot of broken stuff and a creepy Matthew McConaughey constantly feeding us Gunslinger trivia.  The only part of The Dark Tower that really works is when The Gunslinger comes to New York and does his best Last Action Hero impression.

Thankfully the cast they hired was excellent.  Even new comer Tom Taylor sold his role.  The fact these actors had almost nothing but exposition for dialog and almost pulled it off as natural is a minor miracle.  The Dark Tower would have been so much better had people just stopped explaining everything and just started having meaningful character interactions, or better yet shown us what they were explaining.

I don’t know if it was budget or lack of vision that kept Mid-World from being as interesting in the movie as it is in the books, but it was a shame that it felt stripped of everything that made that place feel unique.  I didn’t need a homicidal train in the movie, but it would have been nice to feel like one could have shown up at any minute.  Thanks to the great actors and the brisk pace The Dark Tower ended up being okay.  Almost like the cheep cable version of the book that made you want a real movie.  For people that haven’t read the books this movie might be easier to watch because they don’t know what they are missing.  Though they could also go out and watch The Maze runner or Divergent again and have just as much fun.

Shmee Made It To The Dark Tower

I told myself that I needed to finish Stephen King’s The Dark Tower books before the movie came out, and I did it, barely, so now that I am free to watch the movie, the reviews say that I should skip it.  Which is a bummer because the books are excellent, and people that love fantasy novels should give it a shot.

The series is as weird and crazy as you would hope a Stephen King fantasy series would be, and it is always fun to see his other characters show up in unexpected places.  Not that you need to read his other books to enjoy The Dark Tower.  He has had such a profound impact on pop culture that you will get a lot of the references by just having lived in the 20th and 21st centuries.

If you are thinking you need a few thousand pages to read and you are sick of all the current gritty fantasy books out there, why not travel with The Gunslinger to The Dark Tower.  Who knows it may just be your Ka to do so.